Category Archives: Dear JJ

landmines

Dear JJ, I stepped on a landmine yesterday. They lurk out there in the normal world – unseen, unknown – always taking me by surprise and triggering a rush of emotion.  There is absolutely no way to prepare for them.  No … Continue reading

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happy

I dig my toes into the sand. The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket. I lean against the wind, pretend that I am weightless and in this moment I am happy. I wish you were … Continue reading

Posted in Beyond the Veil, Dear JJ, Remembering | 1 Comment

flashback

Today I saw a body on a stretcher being loaded into a van.  I took it to be from a funeral home because two men in suits were putting it in there. It was the house next to my mom’s. … Continue reading

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peanut butter french toast

Today I pulled out your griddle, from way up high – the cabinet I can’t reach unless I stand on a stool. There were cobwebs on it.  It hasn’t been moved in at least two years, three months, and five … Continue reading

Posted in Dear JJ, Remembering | 4 Comments

surprising gifts

Dear JJ, I know that you know that I had a baby because you wanted kids.  I was so afraid that I would lose who I was – the person I worked so hard to find. But you wanted to … Continue reading

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remembering you

Dear JJ, Today I was brainstorming ideas for a business logo and I started a list of words that made me think of you.  This is my list: Expansive Larger than life Helping others Love Happy Loud Smiling Funny – … Continue reading

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gone

Yesterday I finalized your estate. I thought I’d be excited, doing back flips and leaping for joy, because that was such a freaking pain in the ass.  But I don’t feel that way.  Yes, I’m relieved.  I know it’s good … Continue reading

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